The Days I Felt Ashamed

The following Sassy Stories highlight moments of our lives which can leave us with a sense of shame and embarrassment. At Sassy, we believe that whatever the experience, there will be a sister soul out there who can relate. Maybe one of the following Sassy moments will bring back memories of your own. As always, feel free to get in touch and share with us your thoughts.

The Day I Shat My Pants

There I was, aged 13, sitting on the loo at school looking down at my pants in shock! Covering my floral white cotton knickers was a splodge of dark brown stuff. What that poo? Had I shat my pants without even realising? Out of pure confused embarrassment I took them off, rolled them up into a ball and put them in the bin. A solution that will become a theme throughout these moments. A few hours later the same thing happened again. It was thanks to an older lady who worked at our school who spotted me holding my newly soiled knickers and took me to one side. "I think you may have started your period darling". Penny dropping moment. No poo. Who knew that was what period blood looked like!?

The Day I Lost My Cunnilingus

Aged 17 and I finally had my first almost-boyfriend. That's an 'almost' because it wasn't ever "official" but in the moment of that summer romance, I was feeling teenage love in full floating, mind spinning bursts. My almost-boyfriend and I were at a pool party in the middle of the countryside (the closest feeling I had to being in an episode of the OC) and knew this was a moment when the steaminess in this flourishing relationship was stepping up a notch. As a naive virgin, my experience with sexual touch had been limited to many blow jobs and a couple of fingers thrust up my knickers by horny and ill experienced boys. Behind a bush, on the edge of a field, I was in full make-out session with the almost-boyf, understanding that he was starting to go down on me. Damn, I was desperately excited to be experiencing this moment, knowing I would be welcomed into the Fourth (or was it third, fifth, sixth) Base club. Just as I could feel my pubes starting to air in the wind and a head lowering between my legs, everything stopped. There was an awkwardness in the air and I found myself looking down at the teen who was looking up at me shaking his head. "I'm sorry, I don't really want to do this".

To this day I have fought with the idea that my pubes were what scared the lad away from my vulva. That the reason he didn't want to perform cunnilingus on me was because my genitalia was unattractive to him. But I know that I have turned down many a dick that I've decided I don't want to suck for reasons depending on my mood, my emotions, my experience. Learning not to take these moments personally is important. Trust, ask and learn, always.

The Day I Lost My Nipple

Aged 28 and I'm staying in a wonderful house in Italy, being hosted by a family who I feel so very fortunate to know. In an act of repaying their generosity, I was cleaning the small cubic swimming pool situated in their garden. Dressed in my bikini top and a pair of shorts, I am getting into the act of scrubbing down the walls of the pool, scooping up leaves and pretending to know what I was doing with a very long hose with some funny pumping machine attached to the end. Out comes the father of the family thanking me for getting stuck in with the cleaning. I cheerfully wave off his words, have a chat about what we should do for lunch and continue on with my work. Only to hear him say my name and respectful tell me that my bikini had slipped off one boob. Nipple out, enjoying the Italian heat. Oh! Whoops.